Saturday, February 11, 2017

Reggae

Reggae is a musical genre that's a a little too focused on two themes. Namely, Jamaica and ganja. It's like reggae musicians are always intent on proving that they like those two things. Every day Damien Marley gets up and thinks, "People need to know. People need to know that I'm still pro-marijuana and pro-Jamaica. I should write another song about those topics, and add it to the 432 songs I've already written about them."


Scrabble

Scrabble is a game that makes people salivate over the possibility of using a Q or an X on a triple letter and triple word score. They try to spell words like quizzify and oxyphenbutazone. But they usually give up, and go with words like it, at, and occasionally, ox.

Bill Belichick

Bill Belichick became head coach of the Patriots in 2000. That year, they finished 5-11. Since then, they've had 16 straight winning seasons, including five Super Bowl wins! As far as I'm concerned, that means Coach Belichick should be the most arrogant and condescending person in the world. I actually get annoyed when he shakes the hand of an opposing coach after a game. He should punch that coach in the face.